Tests, allies, enemies

I can't believe how quickly these past few weeks have gone. As the end of term draws near, I've started reflecting on everything I've seen, learnt and written, as well as the friendships I've developed along the way.

Sometimes, I feel as though I'd incredibly lucky to be here, doing exactly what I want to be doing right now. Looking back on the past few weeks, I'm starting to see the changes, in my work, mentally and emotionally.

I suppose it's a combination of factors. I've been pushed outside my comfort zone; it's scary and exciting at the same time. I feel as though I've discovered new emotional depths to draw on when I write. I'm no longer worried what people think, or what my work may reveal about me.

It stands to reason that the more you write, the more you will improve. Having the time just to write has been fantastic. I've started preparing my portfolios for the end of term, and I'm amazed at how much work we've actually done.

Having the support of everyone else on the course, as well as from the lecturers has also been really helpful. Once January comes around and we start our specialist courses we're not really going to be together as a whole group again. It's a shame - this is the best group I've found.

In terms of the journey, I feel as though I've reached Stage 6 - Tests, Allies & Enemies. Now firmly in the special world, I'm totally committed to my quest. I've found my friends. Enemies reveal themselves in terms of negative comments, distractions and doubt, but pen in hand, I'm ready to take them on.

It all depends whose shoes you're standing in....

Last week we were looking at point of view in one of our seminars. As I was working on the assignment at the weekend, it got me thinking. What would it be like if you could see something from someone else's point of view? I don't just mean from what you imagine their perspective to be, but what they actually think.


It would be an interesting superpower - just think of all the things you could do with it! OK, you can stop thinking now..... There would inevitably be people who would use it for less than honourable purposes. There's a big difference between wanting to find out if someone you're attracted to is interested in you and using this 'overheard' information to reinvent yourself as a criminal mastermind.

As a writer, you are in the unique position to know exactly what all your characters think about a given situation. I'd never turned a scene around before and written it from a different character's viewpoint. It was fascinating what changed; tiny things took on new meaning when seen through someone else's eyes. I had fun with the scene, looking for ways I could play with the meaning. It made me realise how much of everyday life is open to interpretation. Each of us makes our own interpretation of everything we experience. Perhaps it's good to step into someone else's shoes once in a while......

Remember, remember....

It's been cold today, much colder that it has been lately. Proper bonfire night weather. It reminds me of going to fireworks displays as a child, getting all wrapped up to huddle around a huge bonfire, eating sausages as the anticipation builds while you wait for the next set of fireworks begin.

It's pure magic. With sparklers.

I've been to a few fireworks displays as an adult, and have always been faintly disappointed. It wasn't as cold (I've found myself leaving half my layers in the car), the fireworks weren't as spectacular and sometimes there weren't even any sausages!

The weather is making me feel rather nostalgic. I may have to hunt down some sparklers and track down a fireworks display to see if the magic has returned.

The death of sleep

I'm in a curious, reflective mood tonight. Ideas are literally clustering around me, jostling for space in my already overcrowed head. My notebook is fast filling up with things to be developed at a later date.

Recently I've noticed a return of the insommnia that peppered my teenage years. Too many thoughts, too little time. I guess that means I'll be burning the midnight oil again.....

But apart from the lack of sleep, this can only be a good thing. After all, this is what I came here for. I've been reading some more of my coursemates' Lady of Shalott inspired stories the evening, I'm impressed. It's fascinating seeing the variety of responses to the same exercise. Each is unique, and distinctive, offering up a different perspective. Every week, we are challenged to do something different, something outside our comfort zone. The best thing is that it doesn't matter if it doesn't work. You learn from it, and you move on.

This morning we had a session on writing for children. We began by looking at some examples of children's books, including one of my all-time favourites, The Hungry Caterpillar. It's amazing how a book can evoke so many memories and feelings. I can still vividly recall numerous books from my childhood that literally transported me into the world they created. It's the compulsion to capture that feeling, to create a world and characters that readers will become lost in, that drives me to write.

Welcome to the dark side

Recently I have noticed a change in my writing. I'm drawn to the dark side.

It's ironic, really, as I've always been a sucker for a happy ending. But the twist, now there's the rub. The way a story hooks you in, and then dashes your expectations when you least expect it. I'm beginning to see how to use this, to play with the emotions of my readers. It's not a nice, safe world out there. There are monsters under the bed (although they may actually be more afraid of you than you are of them) and things that go bump in the night. The latter is usually just me tripping over the crap strewn around my room in the dark.

I've also been reading a lot of Angela Carter and Neil Gaiman. I love the way they take myths and fairytales and subvert them. We've been looking at narrative and genre recently in our Writers' Toolkit sessions doing a similar sort of thing. The idea is that you take the kernel events from a well-known story and then use them as a jumping off point for your own work. It was amazing how few markers we actually needed to identify stories that everyone is aware of, such as Little Red Riding Hood. We are all so familiar with the story that it takes very few references to realise we are reading a version of this tale. It's a great way to start thinking about stories.

Carrying on with the theme of cannibalism from one of our Writing Structure seminar, this week I've created a dark tale based on the Hansel & Gretel story. By using well-known tales as a starting point, the challenge is to weave the references from the original into the new version. I was amazed by the number of very different, inventive and engaging versions of the Icarus myth members of the group came up with. Makes you think....

That's what it's really all about. Anything that makes you think, makes you look at things in a different way. The possibilities are endless.

A Visit from the Time Thief

This morning, as my alarm went off at some hideously early time on a Saturday I dragged my slightly hungover self out of the comfort of my bed and headed into Falmouth. It was a still, calm autumn morning, and dawn lit up Penryn harbour; everything was bathed in a soft amber light. I decided the walk would do me good, and I couldn't pass up the opportunity to take a few photographs while I had the world to myself.

The Cornwall Film Festival kicks off in Falmouth 6-9 November, and I had decided to volunteer , partly because it is a good way to get a free ticket and pick up some useful insider information, and also because volunteering at festivals can be a lot of fun. This morning's meeting was a bit of an induction, a chance to meet the team, check out the venues and mingle with other potential volunteers (as well as we could at 9am without the benefit of serious amounts of caffeine).

Despite my good intentions to return home after the meeting and get on with something a) useful, b) meaningful or c) work that I actually needed complete, I still managed to spend rather a lot of time wandering around Falmouth where I bumped into a couple of friends and bought more stuff in Tescos that I don't really need. The rest of the afternoon disappeared in a blur.

I think someone out there is stealing time. It's the only rational explanation as to why this keeps happening. Several other people I know have reported the same phenomenon. Surely this can't be a coincidence?

Suddenly it was 6.30pm and as I was whipping up another culinary masterpiece, I became rooted to the spot. what strange enchantment was this? Luckily I managed to free myself by the time Strictly Come Dancing had finished, but I was so overcome by this effort that I had to recuperate by spending some time phone talking to one of my best friends.

It's now after 10pm, and I'm just settling down to get started. I think it's going to be a late one....

Fiona is currently unavailable...

Earlier this evening I attempted to add today's musings to my blog, I got the message Blogger is currently unavailable. Strong language followed as I refreshed my browser window, only to be greeted by the same frustrating message.

I want to write my blog, and I want to do it now!

We live in a society where instant gratification is the norm. We have become a society of petulant toddlers; if our desires aren't fulfilled at once then all hell breaks loose. As fond as I am of the internet and the convenience of my mobile phone, I can't help thinking that being in contact with the world 24/7 is not necessarily a good thing. Our lives become a blur as we rush from one thing to another, rarely taking the time to savour the moment, the 'now' of our existence.

Stop the world, I want to get off....

Spending a year doing an MA is an opportunity to concentrate on the things that really matter to me. I think I finally got to the stage where I realised that I couldn't just keep squeezing my dreams into the ever-shrinking amount of time I had to call my own, the time that wasn't taken up by work, family, friends, updating my Facebook account and all the other tedious minutiae of daily life. A few months ago, I faced a choice. 'Now or never' sounds a little dramatic, but I'd reached a point where it was put up or shut up. After the first day of the course, I knew I'd made the right decision.